I am still in bed. Surprisingly, I have been awake for almost 4 hours already but I am still in my sleepwear and haven't gotten up to do anything. I feel so listless, so spiritless. I haven't even turn on the TV to watch anything. I am just listening to my playlist whilst looking at the ceiling, staring at the light. I slept at 2AM thus that makes it 12 hours in bed being lazy. And that also means I have been without food for almost 30 hours already. I just had a few bottles of vodka before bed and a glass of tea midsleep.
No, I am not sick anymore. I am all well. I just don't feel like I have enough energy to get up. It's easier this way. Be stolid. Be impassive. Then just cry when I feel like crying. But yeah I recommend this feeling to everyone. It's good to just indulge in being lazy and letting the body rest. It forces your mind to think. It forces your reason to battle with your choices. I think I have a problem. I just refuse to acknowledge it.
But really what I want to do right now is turn this laptop off, turn all my mobile phones off and lock myself into oblivion, in a place where I am alone and no one would dare let me feel this way.
No, I am not sick anymore. I am all well. I just don't feel like I have enough energy to get up. It's easier this way. Be stolid. Be impassive. Then just cry when I feel like crying. But yeah I recommend this feeling to everyone. It's good to just indulge in being lazy and letting the body rest. It forces your mind to think. It forces your reason to battle with your choices. I think I have a problem. I just refuse to acknowledge it.
But really what I want to do right now is turn this laptop off, turn all my mobile phones off and lock myself into oblivion, in a place where I am alone and no one would dare let me feel this way.
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