In my world, failure is not an option. Simply put, I hate failing.

I have always been the achiever, always at the top of my class (except of course if I intentionally fail a thing so I get the other option in the end). Do you know how it feels when you know you have worked hard for something but still you come out lacking? Do you know how it feels when so much is expected from you? Do you know how it feels to carry the heavy burden we all love to call pressure? It is hard, so hard, all the more when the expectation is so high. I feel like I failed not only myself but also my boss and that is depressing.

Yes, I failed. I just needed 1 more, just 1 correct answer more. I know it's ironic but I guess I have to face the consequence. I passed the oral exams though. I get one more chance to try and pass the written exam. I am so disappointed of myself and no not even a cute merchandise for Eclipse can make me feel better. I just could not begin to reconcile it upon myself why I failed. Sigh! I called my mom and told her that I almost passed and she told me I can make it. I just have to claim the fact that I will. My mom has always been my "cheerleader" and I bet she would wear customized t-shirts with encouraging messages for me if she have to if only to make me feel better.

I don't know...I guess I just have to suck it up and move on and just hope for the best. In the meantime, let me go watch some trailers of new movies over at IMDB. I wish this makes me forget about the pity party I am almost about to throw and that a rainbow will appear soon. Wish me luck! 

How about you? Do you have any depressing experience lately? You know misery loves company. I'll listen to you...

UPDATE 07/30/2010: I passed!!!