By eNotAlone.com
Published: February 3, 2009
With the popularization of personal computers and Internet services all over the world, a growing number of people become more and more involved in
on-line love affairs and even on-line marriages.
Many of you must have heard different kinds of stories about
online dating, which also is known as cyber love, since the rising of the internet. All this became all of a sudden very popular and started affecting our culture, as well as has given millions of lonely people new opportunities to find their romance, and sometimes love, in ways never before possible.
Most of people today have an e-mail and an access to Internet, whether it is at home, or at work. Many spend a lot of time online for work, for fun, and also to connect with friends and family. But then, there is a group of people, for whom the web means the whole world. They can spend every minute of their lives glued to the PC.
First of all, it is very convenient to communicate with people without even leaving a room. You can get to know someone through e-mail, live chats, even have a virtual date if you have a webcam. If anything goes the way that does not suite you, all you have to do is simply disconnect an electronic connection. Looks like a very comfortable and easy thing. But there are few nuances that you might want to take into consideration if you are about to start your virtual relationship.
There is nothing bad actually about the virtual communication and relationship, but it will not hurt to remember that internet is full of irresponsible addicted people who always take an advantage from its flexibility. The process of an online relationship, however, is very different from real time dating process. The online environment is, by its very nature, very restrictive.
On the Internet, communication and interaction are limited to typed words. Voice, emotions, intonation, physical appearance, gestures and expression are all imagined to help build some image and understanding of another person. And very often, the image of the perfect mate is projected, and afterwards, transferred. What is expected to be the perfect soul mate in reality just turns into fantasy.
However, there is a thing that must be said in favor of the internet. It gives people the good opportunity to meet and keep in touch with other people who they might have never met in a real life. With so many people using the Internet, there is always a chance that you could find your mate, just use your common sense, be patient and willing to bring a friendly online relationship into the real world. Afterwards, whatever happens whether in real life or cyber space will all be in your own hands.
Some say that it is against the nature of love to be deprived of the sense of sight, the look, the movement, the body language being present. But those who prefer internet relationships claim that the virtual relationship is based mostly on intense emotions, which appears to be significantly above the simple contemplation of the flesh.
Do not forget that internet dating is often used as an escape from a real world into fantasy. Online, we can be anyone we want to be, or pretend to be, even if we do it just for a few hours. This escape from reality, however, makes online dating more complicated. Because not only you, but someone else as well, might be using the same tactics and playing with you. Not everyone is decent and honest. Internet relationships should be considered as incomplete relationships. A person who looks for a potential soul mate online must want and be prepared to meet offline, too.
Virtual lovers, especially men, often prefer to move very quickly from online courtship to intimate subjects, therefore omitting all the important dating stages. In cyber romances everything is accepted much easier and usually people don't realize the other person's little endearing or annoying personal features. This, in its turn, very often can lead to a serious emotional attachment to a person one would not even stand to be close in real life.
Who is in reality there, on the other side of your personal computer, you will find out, only if you two decide to meet in a real life. Many people do not even want it because very often real meetings of virtual lovers end up with mutual disappointment. For example, he can be actually fifty instead of twenty. Or can even appear of same sex with you. Or the picture you have been sent was not his. That is why people in many cases prefer to live with their idealistic fantasy, rather than encounter the obvious disillusion.
In fact, there are many happy endings from online romances. There are many couples that met over the Internet and are happily married. For those who are left disappointed, whether in real or virtual life, there is a real pain and hurt that always accompanies love and feelings. No matter what kind of relationship you decide to chose for yourself, just know, that it requires common sense, patience, dedication, honesty and reality.
